646: Retraining the negative bias of your mind

This week on the Anxiety Slayer Podcast we’re discussing how you can learn to retrain your mind to be more positive.

 

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This episode of Anxiety Slayer is sponsored by BetterHelp

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Notes from this week’s episode:

Definition: A negativity bias makes us subconsciously give more psychological significance to negative experiences than positive ones of same intensity.

We are all wired to give more weight to negative rather than positive experiences.

This means our construction of reality, not the facts, is driving our thoughts and our behavior.

The bias in our mind affects our outlook, choices, and behavior. It’s all happening beneath the surface of our awareness, but it affects our interactions looking out into the world.

A negative bias can influence us to expect the worst, or to seek distraction from discomfort, or numb out because it doesn’t feel good.

Non identifying with the mind

When you are suffering with stress and anxiety your perception becomes painfully biased. You may tend to lock into painful experiences and worries and disconnect from the things that can help you feel positive, grounded and safe; like the sweet  people in your life, your surroundings, triumphs and achievements.

The mind will disturb us by imagining problems that don’t exist and by exaggerating small challenges into big worries.

The mind creates F.E.A.R by showing us False Evidence Appearing Real. - Zig Ziglar

Here’s where non-identifying with the mind can help us feel more peaceful. Ayurveda teaches that we are not our minds, and we are not our thoughts. 

Watching your thought patterns and responses

Our mind is like an iceberg, most of it is buried beneath the surface of our awareness. This is where our fears are and where our unconscious patterns are running.

Making the unconscious known to us is the real work in changing our negative bias. Noticing our habitual reactions, sitting with them and noticing how they feel, then deciding what we want to change.

We don’t want to fight the mind, that only strengthens its negative energy.

The goal is to be neutral with soft non judgmental observation with minimal energy.

Practice noticing patterns with compassion and making gentle adjustments.

Setting intentions

Once you’re noticing the biases in your mind you can start setting alternative intentions.

Choosing how you want to respond and practice those new responses.

You can try this as an exercise weekly, or daily, where you sit down and go over some situations and your responses and think about how you would rather see things.

Doing this on paper helps make it a more effective exercise.

For example, you could chose to approach situations with curiosity, a pause before responding, or looking for the bigger picture.

Begin by deciding how you want to experience your week, or day. Ask yourself how would I rather see things?

Begin by deciding how you want to experience your week, or day. Ask yourself how would I rather see things?

A bias can be seen as leaning toward or favoring something. What do you want to lean towards?

The mind has a natural negativity bias, but you can change it!

Look for good role models.

We have limited control over our circumstances, but we have unlimited control over our consciousness. - Gauranga das Monk and author

Brain training practice

The first thing to do to bring balance to your mind is become aware of the state of the mind.

  • Watch your mind and notice when negative thoughts surface.

  • Look at the nature of the most persistent thoughts: are they fearful, angry, sad, or something else?

  • Practice choosing a replacement thought. To replace fear thoughts, think of something you trust. Meditate on some certainty, something always true, like the sun rising each morning. For sadness, draw your mind to something that brings you joy. You can also use affirmations and gratitudes.

  • If you want to use affirmations you can state your intent, for example “I replace this anxiety, with joy or excitement“ repeat three times.

  • Repeat this practice every time you notice your mind defaulting to negative thoughts.

Keep a note in your journal of your successes with this practice along with your daily gratitudes.

Close each day remembering positive moments - Joy Spotting

Write down some good things that happened in your day. It can be any little or simple thing that was good and something to be thankful for. Writing them down begins the process of retraining your brain.

Look for inspiration wherever you personally find it, inspiration nourishes the mind and engages it in more peaceful and hopeful thoughts. 

This daily practice helps prime your mind for gratitude, and helps overcome the mind’s natural bias for negativity.

>>NEW FOR OUR PATRONS<< A Guided Tapping Session to help support the mind when it’s running a negative bias.

You can use this session daily to help retrain the mind to think more positive thoughts, or as an SOS Tapping Session any time you feel overwhelmed with unwanted thoughts you are struggling to control.

Get over 150 Guided Relaxations, Tapping Sessions, and Ayurvedic Teachings for calming anxiety at Patreon.com/anxietyslayer